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Editor’s note: Thanks to Jamaican Twitter for making this hashtag what it was. Your sense of humour helps to keep us all sane.

Maybe you were as confused as I was when you saw this Jamaica Observer headline: “Bunting to deliver lecture on ‘Divine Intervention'”.


The actual topic is: The Underpinning of Crime in Jamaica from Quant to Kartel: The Need for Divine Intervention. The report quoted Jamaica Theological Seminary president, Rev. Garnet Roper, saying that it “promises to be informative”.


So, last evening, myself and others conceptualized what other lecture series may be forthcoming from members of the current administration. Ladies and gents, here they are:


“A Pinch of Salt” – presented by Lisa Hanna

 “Holding Your Breath…For Better Governance” – presented by Noel Arscott

“Just Gimme Di Light” –  a symposium hosted by Phillip Paulwell (for a flat fee)

“On Rare Earth Metals and Number Portability: A Strategy for Growth and Development” – Phillip Paulwell

“Engineering JEEP, Convincing the Electorate their Lives will be Better” – sponsored by the NEC

“Total Recall: How The JEEP Should have worked and lessons from GM” – The JEEP Secretariat

“Logistics Hub – How to Lead Major Development Projects without Being Seen” – Anthony Hylton

“Managing Scandals” (Guest Lecturer: Olivia Pope)

“The Cuban Light Bulb Saga – I Did It My Way” (workbook “How many ways to screw in a lightbulb?” included)

“Ask the PNP: Political Communication in the 21st Century”  

“Coping with Erraticism in Parliament” – Keynote Speaker: Lisa Hanna

“Five fish and a Lizard: Chinese Edition” – presented by Omar Davies

“Who Ate My Rice? Questions from the Electorate” – featuring Roger Clarke

“Climate Change: Wah Name Suh?” – hosted by Bobby Pickersgill

“Are Your Lights On?” – Information session hosted by Phillip Paulwell

“101 Ways To Cook Bully Beef” (entrance fee – bring your own key)

“Same Problems, Same Cast – Maintaining Power in the Era of Youthfulness and Betty-Ann Blaine”

 “I Got 99 Bulbs and a TeleComm” by Phillip Paulwell

“How to eat oxtail instead of chicken back” – Roger Clarke

“Gastronomical Joys Amid Inflation & Devaluation” – Roger Clarke

“The Business of Beauty In An Economic Downturn” – address by Lisa Hanna

“Falling Dollar, Rising Blood Pressure: Balancing People’s Lives”

“The Great Wall From China”

“Cousin-ship and Progress In Contemporary Jamaica: How I Stumbled Upon Jamaica’s Sports Portfolio” – Natalie Neita Headley

Acing Austerity. Passing IMF Tests: What Bruce Failed to Do   

“Beyond Stewing Goats: How Beijing Conquered the Goat Islands” – presented by Omar Davies

“Destabilizing your country’s economy using the method” – with Omar Davis

“Tax Dem! My Legacy, Making Handcarts A Luxury” – with intro by “di same likkle bobo yout wah name Fitzroy”

“Symbolic Fees: Re-imagining  Garrisons, Power and Entitlement in the 21st Century” – Phillip Paulwell

“Battery life for Jamaica at 21%: Finding an outlet”

“100 Ways to Dagger a Nation” (not approved by the Broadcasting Commission)

“Frequent Flyer Miles: How to placate them with the JEEP from around the world”

“Mega What? Energy Efficiency and Productivity for Prosperous Jamrock”

“Loving the poor and other delusions” – keynote address by Portia Simpson Miller (also available on audiobook)

“How the Jamaican economy outpaced my girth – 1994 -2014” – presentation by Lloyd B. Smith

“Shape Bad Like”: A Biomedical Approach to Economic Analysis

“Marvanomics – A Grassroots Guide for Economic Expansion” – Portia Simpson Miller

“Contract Negotiation,  Speedy Implementation Tactics and More” – by Richard Azan

“How to reduce your JPS bill: a bridge to electricity”

“The Vine Intervention:Crime Solutions for our times”

“Bovine Intervention: Election promises for our times”

“From Here to Inflation”

“Trafigura: a case study in transparency”

“Chairman of the board: An effective and legal channel for cronyism”

“Steady Dollar Devaluation: Modern Growth Strategies” – Peter Phillips

“Going the distance: reducing jet lag while remaining ineffective”

“Budget Schmudget: Why We Can’t Have Nice Things”

“The Dark Side: an analysis of Jamaica’s Energy Policy”

“Ni Hao: 5 letters to economic salvation”

“JEEP: Distracting the People Six Weeks at a Time”

“Giving Exports the Edge: Rapid Currency Devaluation”

“Jobs, jobs, jobs and other sound bites that win elections”

“We Love Poor People. An Exploration of PNP Economic Policy through  the decades”

“Jamaica Employ: A Practical Solution for Skilled Labour Employment” 

“Dry Cry: Solving Jamaica’s Water Crisis”

“Eat Your Oxtail! Protecting the Have-Nots, Preventing the Consumption of Chicken Back by the Haves” – by Roger Clarke

“Whispers in the Dark: Energy Options for Jamaica”

“Let Them Eat Oxtail: Food Security in a Non-election Year”

“Descent into Nastiness: A Study of (mis)Management” – presented by the NSWMA

“They Can Always Move… and other creative problem solving approaches” – Chaired by Noel Arscott

“Failing Full Circle: The Jamaican Story from the Riverton Landfill to the Jamaica Stock Exchange” – Peter Phillips

“Come on baby light my fire: Modern Waste solutions” – Intro by  the NSWMA

“From Kern to Kartel: Justice For All”

“Soft Landings: Why we Love the Party” – A panel discussion with Easton, Jennifer, Collin, Garnet and Kern

“Borrowing Our Way Out of Debt: A We Fi Tell Yuh”

Portia’s Platitudes: The Platform of Parliamentary Power

“I’m Staying. And You’re Gonna Love Me.”

“Devaluation is a good thing: Economics in the spin cycle”

“Free Homes Win Elections: Winning Campaign Strategies”

“Pull Up To Mi Bumpa: an evaluation of traffic congestion in Portmore”

“Enemies of the State: Protecting Country and Fellow Men from Cameras, Mics and Opposition” – Portia Simpson Miller

“I am Woman hear me roar” – Marva, Portia and Lisa tell their stories

“Catch me if you can : correlations, coefficients & other statistical alignment between our athletes & the exchange rate”

“How we satisfied the IMF and killed the Middle Class”

Winging It: A guide to public governance and policy formation”

“Get Into Shape: Stop Looking Like The Economy” Fitness Tips w/ Dr. Dayton Campbell

“Call the Contractor: Infrastructure development” by Richard Azan

“From PJ to Azan: The Law Is Not A Shackle”

“You light up my life: Energy Saving Initiatives” by Kern Spencer

“Hair for Today/Tomorrow & Beyond – The Bang”  – by Portia Simpson Miller

“Prayer Fasting and Crime fighting” – Peter Bunting

“The 110m Dollar Dash” (intro by Merlene Ottey)

“Let them eat oxtail: National Nutrition Policy”

“Build and Squat” – presented by Richard Azan

“Carry Your Candle, Go Light Your Home” – Guest Lecturer: Kelly Tomlin


Hope you enjoyed the series! See you next time!

Think, Jamaica.

– @MizDurie, @THINKJamaica



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